


Twofold

by murdur



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Baby Fic, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-12
Updated: 2014-03-01
Packaged: 2017-12-11 16:35:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/800825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/murdur/pseuds/murdur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki finds many commonalities between himself and his child while Sif muses over her new life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Twofold

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Mother's Day. I've been watching too many baby videos on youtube, don't judge me.

Sif unclasped the final hook binding the metal bracer to her forearm and unwound the maroon cloth that lay underneath from her hand and arm with practiced speed, setting the last of her training gear in its rightful place in the armory. Stripped to her leathers and a light silver tunic, Sif parted the room with haste, walking with determined steps echoing off the shining floors of the long palace corridors. The warrior kept her head forward as she moved, firelight from the high torches illuminating her path as the skies of Asgard grew darker.

Sif’s fingers itched, eager to reach her destination. When she reached the heavy golden doors she sought, the warrior threw them open with great anticipation, entering the chamber with quick steps but paused at the sight before her. On the other side of the room stood a low long sofa with Loki’s lithe form stretched across it. And upon his chest a small baby was settled, one long hand spread securely across the infant’s small back. Ullr laid with a plump cheek pressed to Loki’s chest causing his small, bowed lips to be slightly parted in his slumber. He slept with his legs tucked up under himself and one small hand fisting into the loose dark material of Loki’s shirt.

Sif padded silently across the floor of the spacious living chambers, observing as Ullr’s small form rose and dipped with the rhythmic lull of Loki’s deep breathing, smiling at the way Loki’s own lips were parted slightly, soft snores escaping his thin mouth.

Bending down, Sif gently slid one hand under Ullr’s chest, fingers spreading to support his round cheek and her other coming to rest on his bottom as she gingerly lifted him from beneath Loki’s hand. The baby’s arms flailed in an uncoordinated motion briefly, a small squeak escaping as Sif settled him against her shoulder.

At the shifting movement and loss of contact, Loki’s entire body jerked awake, both his arms raising to his chest and his eyes flying open wide. When his wild eyes landed on Sif with Ullr safely resting in her arms, a smirk pulled at the prince’s lips and he settled back into the cushions. Sif nudged his long legs with her own knee, bidding him to make room for her on the plush couch. Loki dragged his legs towards himself until Sif was settled into the sofa with Ullr propped up against her chest, at which time he promptly draped his legs back across her lap. Sif rolled her eyes but did not protest, focusing on the child in her arms. She cradled Ullr to her, holding him under his rear, with her other hand resting on the back of his neck where his head laid against her shoulder as he dozed peacefully.

Sif ran her hand against the soft fabric of the baby’s warm pajamas in a soothing motion and pressed her lips to dark tufts of soft black hair, breathing in the smell of him. She sighed, marveling at the calming effect the small, warm presence she held in her arms had on her. 

“It appears that my first day returning to the training yard has been exhausting for all,” Sif spoke lowly, watching from the corner of her vision as the sides of Loki’s lips pulled up from where he laid with his eyes shut.

He lazily blinked his eyes open, sitting up in an unhurried motion. He lifted himself until he was resting with his head on Sif’s opposite shoulder of where the baby had his own cheek pressed and he curled against her side. “Mmm,” he agreed softly. “It was an eventful day.”

Loki lifted one fine-boned hand, placing it gently on the back of Ullr’s head, his thumb softly brushing against the smooth skin of the baby’s temple. Ullr stirred, rubbing his face against Sif’s chest and making small noises before settling under Loki’s touch.

“The two of you looked to be quite the pair. Practically mirror images of each other, drool and all,” Sif murmured.

“We are discovering that we already share many common interests, Ullr and I.” Loki spoke softly into her collarbone, gazing at the child across Sif’s bosom.

“Is that so? Something aside from a constant need for attention?”

Loki ignored her slight, continuing to gently stroke the baby’s head. “I’ve discovered that we both grow extremely irritable when hungry.”

“Ah yes,” Sif snorted, recalling the innumerable times she had found Loki locked away somewhere in the palace hunched over stacks of dusty old books, poring over the tomes for days on end grumbling to himself and snapping in bad temper at all who disturbed him. It wasn't until Sif would practically drag him to the dining halls and force him to eat that his sour demeanor would dissipate.

“What else?” she asked, resting her cheek against the top of the baby’s head.

“Pulling Thor’s hair brings us both great joy. And the sight of Fandral’s face drives us to tears.”

“Loki.”

He continued on, ignoring Sif’s halfhearted reprimand and slid his face further down her chest. “And of course, the both of us are quite enthusiastic about your breasts,” he hummed into her skin, nuzzling playfully into her bust.

" _Loki._ "

The prince laughed low before raising his head to press a soft kiss to the skin of her neck, sliding his free arm between her back and the couch and curving gently around her waist. 

“And we are both utterly inconsolable without your presence.” 

Sif rolled her eyes again, but smiled softly at his words. Loki smoothed his hand from Ullr’s soft head, down his back where Sif’s calloused hands held his small frame. He traced his fingers lightly down her arm, pausing when he reached the skin just below her elbow.

“You are bleeding,” Loki observed. His finger traced the small gash that marred her skin.

Sif huffed in reply. “It was well deserved. It appears that my body has grown soft and slow in my absence from the training grounds.” She ducked her head, her voice dropping. "Perhaps it was foolish of me to think that I could remain the warrior I've always been..."

“Sif,” Loki mused against her shoulder. “Hardly any time has passed since you carried the child within you. You will return to your previous form, in time. You must be patient. If you hadn’t practically threatened both Thor and Eir to agree to let you return to your post early...”

“I have little time for patience. I do not like waiting.”

“I’ve never noticed,” Loki smiled against her. “Speaking of waiting, Ullr and I were attempting to wait up for your return, as he was quite eager to present you with your gift.”

Loki motioned towards the low table before them where a small vase held a single, long-stemmed rose of deep red. “We visited Mother’s gardens this afternoon and during our stroll, Ullr spotted this particular blossom. He informed me that it reminded him of you and I was wont to agree.”

Raising her eyebrows Sif eyed the bloom. “Because I am a delicate flower?” she asked flatly.

“Roses are quite the complex growth. This particular flower has a strong stem, lined with fearsome, sharp thorns. An effective, cutting safeguard. Resilient. And then the petals, hardy and vividly colored, are undeniably alluring in their elegance. It would be foolish to deny the flower its duality. Beautiful and dangerous.”

“Those were quite the honeyed words, Silvertongue.” Sif fought to keep the smile off of her face, unable to deny the warmth the somewhat cliched words struck in her heart. “Sentimental, even. Are you losing your touch?”

Loki sat up at her words, lifting himself into a regal posture and gazing at her with serious eyes. “Oh, never. The words were purely Ullr’s. I am just relaying his observations. But he is just a babe, we cannot fault him for his unsophisticated words, now can we?”

“No, we cannot.” Sif leaned towards him, gently pressing her lips to his. Loki wrapped one hand under her chin, holding her to him for a long, languid kiss. Sif sighed as they broke apart, Loki lowering his head to her shoulder once more. Sif pressed her lips to the baby’s head. “Thank you,” she whispered, feeling warm and content surrounded by that which she loved most.


	2. Routine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday [Lana](http://archiveofourown.org/users/nayanroo)!
> 
> Thank you for being an enabler of Loki/Sif feels and _baby_ feels. It's due to a large part that these silly little stories exists because of you and your babby texts.

As the days passed, Ullr grew bigger and stronger soon able to hold his own head up while he gazed upon the world with inquisitive eyes.

Sif found her own body growing stronger, slowly but surely returning to her previous physical form. As for her mental state, she found her desire to train and to fight was even fiercer than before the birth of her child. Sif always held her love of her Realm above all else, and now that Asgard was home to this new, tiny life, she felt her fire to protect it blaze even brighter.

Determined to continue her warrior pursuits and resume her post, Sif and Loki both found ways to adjust their routines to include their new addition. Though Lady Frigga and Thor were both overjoyed at the opportunity to look after the baby, it was often that he could be found strapped to Sif’s chest, dozing unperturbed as she worked the warrior trainees through grueling routines (many new recruits whispered amongst themselves that she was even _more_ terrifying with a baby in her arms). 

It was just as standard to find Ullr bundled in Loki’s arms, peering out at the members of the Royal council as his father sat in on long debates and conferences, fulfilling his duties as advisor to Thor’s new kingship. 

With such responsibilities, using a handmaid was sometimes unavoidable, but both Loki and Sif made an effort to spend time together during the evening, developing a bedtime routine. After long days spent in the heat and intensity of the training yards fulfilling her own duty to the Realm Eternal, Sif looked forward to this quiet, peaceful time and tonight was no different.

She carried a metal basin across the spacious bathing room, setting it onto the top of an ornate marble counter, careful not to slosh the small amount of warm water over the edges. Loki followed her across the room, holding a naked Ullr in his arms. Careful to support his head, Loki slowly lowered the baby into the small tub, smiling at the way Ullr squealed in delight.

Sif and Loki stood over the basin, running a soft cloth gently against his small head and body as the baby kicked and splashed happily in the shallow water. He cooed, looking up into their faces as his parents wiped away the day’s grime from his soft skin, dipping into folds and rolls, and between fingers and toes.

Sif savored their routine, admiring the baby’s fat legs and round belly as he enjoyed his bath. The way he looked up, enraptured, when Loki spoke lowly to him made her heart swell. She coveted the way he shrieked and laughed when she made ridiculous faces or absurd sounds. Loki shook his head at her foolishness but said nothing.

Taking a small dollop of mild hair oil, the warrior took the opportunity to gently pull Ullr’s dark hair through her fingers. She formed his wet tufts into the spikes of a mohawk down the center of his head. “Look!” she proclaimed. “Does not such a hairstyle suit him well? He has the makings of a future Berserker!”

She laughed at the sour look that crossed Loki’s face, obviously not amused. He sat Ullr up in the basin to run the cloth against the baby’s back, but not before he smoothed his hair into a more demure style, murmuring to himself something about embodying a regal bloodline.

“Oh, and you don’t think fighting with single-minded determination for your kingdom is a noble pursuit?” Sif challenged playfully.

“Of course it is,” Loki glared, dismissing Sif’s baiting words. “But there is no need to forgo _style_ while doing so.”

They continued bickering genially, as they were often wont to do, while they finished cleansing the baby's soft skin. Oblivious to his parents’ fighting over his future career and fashion choices, Ullr cheerfully gurgled in the warm water. He grasped his foot and tugged it uncoordinatedly to his mouth, gnawing happily at his toes.

“Unable to speak yet already putting his foot in his mouth,” Loki grinned, unfolding a soft towel and holding it up. “He truly is your son.”

Sif rolled her eyes and lifted Ullr out of the basin, handing the naked baby off to Loki to wrap him in the warmth of the towel. “I will cut that silver-tongue out of your head if you do not have care,” she threatened amiably whilst they strolled out of the bathing chambers, Loki taking Ullr into his nursery while she entered their own bedchamber.

Sif stripped down in front of her vanity, dropping her clothes upon the low chair. Out of her large dresser, she pulled a flowing blue nightgown and changed quickly into the soft silk. Padding with bare feet, she crossed back into the nursery, following the sound of Loki’s smooth voice speaking lowly to the child.

The prince had dried and dressed him in fuzzy grey pajamas and Ullr looked on in wonder while Loki produced soft sparks and dancing colors from his fingertips. She smiled, watching Ullr reach up from where he laid on his back to grasp a smoky image of a wolf and the illusion flicker and fade as his uncoordinated hand went through it.

Continuing her journey across the room, Sif plopped down in the rocking chair set near the baby’s crib. Beautifully ornate, the chair was hand-carved from a cherry tree, a gift from the All-Father, presented along with Ullr’s crib shortly before his birth. The warrior ran her calloused hands along the smooth wood of the chair’s arms and tried not to laugh at the way Loki spoke to the baby in complete, complex sentences as if he were conversing with a fellow scholar and the way Ullr would tilt his head or coo as if in comprehension, his tiny hand landing on his father’s sharp nose.

  
Loki lifted the child from where he was lying across the top of his blanket on the changing table. Upon their approach, Sif slipped one side of her nightgown off her shoulder. Loki shifted Ullr’s small form and leaned down to rest him in Sif’s arms. Before straightening, he placed a long hand against the back of her hair and pressed his lips to her forehead.

Sif smiled. Since she had given birth, it seemed as though Loki had grown more affectionate, or at least he was now more outright with displays. The warrior could not deny that she enjoyed such treatment, even if it still sometimes caught her off-guard. Tipping her head back and up she found Loki’s lips with her own, kissing him, dawdling. Righting himself, he waved a hand, causing the candlelight in the room to grow dimmer before he took leave to change into his own sleeping clothes.

Hearing a small squeak, Sif turned her eyes to the babe in her arms, smiling tenderly at his tiny yawn. "Oh, are we boring you?" She adjusted his warm body, holding him to her bare breast. When he latched, she began to rock softly. He peered up at her while she gazed down upon him, quietly humming lullabies (she would not afflict him with her singing voice) and murmuring tales of old. Sif treasured these moments, the chance to hold her child close, to nurse and bond, a time shared only between them.

It wasn’t long before Ullr grew full and was lulled by the soothing motion of the rocking chair, his suckling slowing and his eyes growing heavy. Sif grinned fondly as he valiantly fought to stay awake, resisting the call to sleep. Stubborn, like his mother and father already.

  
Carefully lifting herself from the chair and adjusting her gown, Sif delicately placed the baby into his crib, rubbing his tummy and smoothing his hair. Long arms wrapped slowly around her waist and Sif sighed leaning back against Loki and gazing upon their child. They stood quietly, watching him sleep with his small fists thrown up near his plump cheeks. Sif folded her arms across Loki’s, brushing her fingers absentmindedly against his pale skin. It oftentimes still seemed surreal to her, what her life had become.

As if reading her thoughts, Loki murmured into her ear. “It is sometimes hard to believe something so perfect exists.”

She sighed happily. “Let’s have another one.”

Quite suddenly, Sif felt Loki stiffen at her back. His word was sharp. “No.”

She turned in his arms, confused. “What kind of reaction was that? Did you not just say –”

“Sif, please.” He looked at her with something that looked like panic in eyes. “Drop it.”

“No.” She pushed him back with a firm hand and stepped out of his embrace, glaring up at him. “My words will not, _I_ will not be dismissed so easily. This is something I wish to discuss. Now tell me –”

“No,” Loki whispered. The dread in his face and his voice grew as he continued, “I can’t. Sif, I won’t –” Abruptly, the prince turned and fled from the room.

“What in Hel’s name?” She cursed under her breath, pacing the room in her confusion. A sudden anger washed over her, why would he act like that? Was it such an abhorrent thing, to think about bringing another child into the world?

She stopped her pacing at the baby’s crib, considering the gentle rise and fall of his chest. It cannot be due to Ullr, she thought, suddenly overwhelmed with a sorrowful ache in her chest. It cannot be that. It cannot.

Then it must be her. Perhaps he did not think that she is fit for motherhood. The thought pierced through Sif’s heart and she sat heavily in the rocking chair. The longer she rocked, the more her sadness turned to fury. She had adapted well. She'd done everything in her power to retain who she once was while allowing for certain changes. _Better_ changes, she thought. They knew there would be sacrifices, but was it not worth it?

Confused and infuriated, Sif rose from the chair and strode into their chambers. Loki was faced away from her on the bed and feigning sleep, she was sure. She said nothing as she climbed under the sheets, turning her back to him and laying awake to ponder until the sun rose.

Two days dragged by and they hardly said a word to each other. Sif was certain that Loki was avoiding her and their abandoned conversation. During one afternoon, she spied on him in the nursery with Ullr. His face was open and happy in a way it was not with anyone else except the squealing baby. Sif felt relief at the sight, but also a selfish, sinking sensation. Quite suddenly she felt very weary.

After the third night of going through their usually happy bedtime routine in complete silence, Sif could take no more. Squaring her shoulders she confronted him in their bedchamber, dreading her words and his response but unable to live with the silent alternative.

“Do you not care for the child? Do you not love him?” Her words came out harsher than expected, pushed out in her anxiety. 

Loki looked like he’d been slapped, the hurt apparent on his face. “Of course I do,” his voice was low. “More than anything.”

Sif nodded once and continued on. “So then it is me. Does the thought of seeing me grow round with child again repel you so?”

Loki blinked in surprise, his brow crumpling in anguish. “No. Sif, please.”

  
Why wouldn’t he admit it? she wondered, growing impatient. “Just tell me what it is, Loki!”

“I can’t –,” he stopped himself and swallowed hard, dropping his eyes. “I cannot risk it.”

His eyes searched hers, pleading with her for understanding. But Sif stared at him cooly, waiting for him to continue.

“When you were pregnant with Ullr, things did not go…well.”

“Ah.” Her pregnancy was difficult, to be certain but her daily bouts of illness and constant chills seemed like a small price to pay to hold Ullr in her arms. But it was her labor and during childbirth that she truly very nearly died. If had taken the effort, knowledge, and magic of all of Asgard’s best healers and Loki himself to keep her from dying in her birthing bed.

“With you being of Asgard and I a Jot-, a…what I am. I thought you were going to leave me behind. I cannot do that to you again.” The guilt and hurt in his voice pulled Sif closer and she took his hands in hers as his head dropped and he continued in a whisper. “I can’t bear the thought of losing you, of _Ullr_ losing you. I can’t do this alone. We need you.”

  
Reaching up, Sif placed a hand on his pained face, brushing along the sharp ridge of his cheek to wipe away a tear. Her heart felt heavy and ached at his words but she could also not deny the small part of her that felt relief at his reasoning.

“And what about me? Do I not have say in the matter?”

He looked ready to protest further but held his tongue at the fire in her eyes.

“I have no plans to leave this life without a fight, and I am stronger now than I have ever been. Eir and the healers would be better prepared this time, know what to expect. We’d _all_ be better prepared.”

  
Loki did not reply but seemed to consider her words. She took that as a good sign.

“Perhaps you could find some texts in the library regarding children of multiple Realms, spend some time researching. We will travel all the branches of Yggdrasil if we must until we find all that we can on the matter. I am not proposing that another child is something for us to want right this very moment, but perhaps in the future.”

Loki nodded once, seemingly mollified. “Well, it is a topic that we can continue to discuss.”

“Thank you.” Sif smiled up at him, feeling victorious. And victories called for celebrations. She pushed her hands into his hair, pulling his face down to hers for a long kiss. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, holding her close. “And in the meantime, we can practice,” she murmured slyly against his lips, tumbling him back onto their bed. “Just in case.”


	3. Milestones

After spending a lazy morning with his son in the palace, Loki carried Ullr down to the training yard to watch his mother and uncle before they would break for the afternoon meal together. Loki stood on the edge of the ring next to the Warriors Three holding the baby in his arms, watching as his wife and brother battled against each other in the ring, the clash of their weapons clanging loudly over the sound of their grunts and competitive barbs. 

Sif saw them approach out of the corner of her eye, heard Ullr screech happily in her direction and hesitated momentarily to smile towards the side of the ring. Thor took the opportunity to use her distraction against her, swinging Mjolnir at the warrior from the side her head was angled away from. Catching the flash of silver barreling towards her ribcage, Sif moved swiftly, parrying the strike with her glaive and forcing Thor’s massive arm upwards. Giving herself enough space to duck under, she efficiently twisted under his arm and positioned herself behind him as the force from his mighty swing propelled his body around. Lifting her booted foot, she planted it against his broad back, throwing her weight to push the golden haired man off balance and forward onto to the ground. 

He landed hard against the dirt, shaking the ground and sending a puff of brown dust into the air. When the dirty haze cleared, Sif saw Thor rolled onto his back beaming up at her in happy surprise as she pointed the tip of her sword near his throat. 

“Fine footwork! I thought for certain the arrival of my nephew would distract you enough to give me the upper hand.” Sif smiled fondly down at her friend and offered her hand, which Thor gladly took. She helped to haul him to his feet as he launched into dissecting their match, praising Sif’s technique. 

A short distance across the yard, Hogun had pulled out his newly acquired throwing knives and Loki stood, admiring the blades and conversing with him over the blades’ composition. As he spoke, Ullr squirmed in his arms to be put down, arching his back and kicking his long legs. 

The baby had grown much as the seasons had changed and nearly a year had passed since his birth. He moved quickly from rolling himself onto his stomach to mastering crawling. Exploring the palace with curious eyes, he could not be found without either Loki or Sif hurrying after him before he could put some stray blade or forgotten potion into his mouth.

Most recently he had taken to pulling himself up on low furniture, standing on shaky legs and attempting a step before falling on his bottom. Each time he plopped to the hard, gleaming gold of the palace floors, he would happily pull himself back up with admirable determination, better than what Sif saw each day from some of her novice soldiers in the training yards. 

Loki was determined to help him succeed in taking his first steps. The prince spent his days bent at the waist; Ullr’s small hands wrapped around his long fingers, walking long distances about their living quarters as Ullr led him in happy exploration on wobbly legs. So far, each time Loki had attempted to extract a finger from the baby’s grip, Ullr would invariably end up collapsing. Loki had even taken to trying to coax the child to release his perch once he had pulled himself up on their low table or by the legs of Sif’s trousers, tempting him to let go with his favorite stuffed dragon or a sweet treat held a few short steps out of reach. Sif just laughed and ruffled Loki’s hair as each time the attempt at that first unaided step sent Ullr sprawling to the floor. Loki’s efforts were nearly as single-minded as his attempts to coerce Ullr to say ‘dada’, which had also proven to be futile. 

“Mama!” Ullr squealed, arching his back until Loki was forced to set him down.

“Yes, I know but Mama is busy talking to your Uncle right now.” Leaning down Loki lowered the child to the dusty ground to stand. Ullr clasped his fingers, finding his balance.

“Ma-ma-ma-ma,” he continued to babble, pulling at Loki’s supportive hands. 

“You’re as stubborn as she is,” Loki grumbled fondly and followed behind Ullr as he began taking a few determined steps across the yard, his jerky steps raising small puffs of dirt from the ground. 

“Sif,” Loki called out. The shieldmaiden spared a glance towards his voice, smiling at her husband bent like a hunched old man over their child, which had become a familiar sight to her as of late, before turning back to Thor. 

Ullr screeched one time before continuing his chanting of “muh-muh-muh”.  Clearly determined to win her attention, Loki felt Ullr’s grip loosen on his fingers as he continued to march towards his mother. His heart jumped in excitement, sensing his son’s steely resolve. 

“Sif!” 

At that, Thor and Sif turned more fully, seeing the pair rapidly approaching. 

“Oh,” Thor stated in surprise before breaking into a grin. “He is on a war path.” 

Sif grinned wildly and crouched down, extending her arms. “Come on, Ullr,” she encouraged. “You can do it.” 

“Come on, Ullr!” Thor exclaimed placing himself behind Sif to watch his nephew’s progression and waving over the Warriors Three. Ullr squealed again, seeing his mother’s waiting arms before him, continuing his steady stride towards her. 

Tentatively, Loki tugged his fingers gently from the child’s grasp. “Go get Mama,” he murmured hopefully, lowering himself to one knee with his hands raised hesitantly behind Ullr’s back in expectation. Everyone held their breath, watching the baby teeter slightly, tensing in anticipation of his fall. 

Apparently undeterred by the loss of his father’s support, Ullr did not stop his journey towards Sif, swinging his freed arms forward to reach for her. The motion propelled him onwards - taking _one, two, three, four_ wobbly steps before toppling forward. 

Sif caught him under his arms, giving a happy shout. Across from her, Loki stood upright, pride splitting his face into a delighted smile. Thor and the Warriors Three cheered and whooped above the baby, roaring their congratulations at his newest milestone. 

With his mother supporting him under his arms, Ullr looked up at the sudden commotion around him, directed at him. For a moment, he was startled into stillness, his happy smile at making it into his mother’s arms frozen upon his mouth. And then his face suddenly crumpled, bursting into overwhelmed tears. 

“Aww,” Thor laughed. “Apologies, little one. We meant only to rejoice your determination and bravery!”

Sif laughed, scooping Ullr up and pressing kisses to his face and dark hair as he clutched at her, big tears sliding down his cheeks.

 “Yes, you will find that bellowing loudly is the preferred pastime of warriors. You are right to be alarmed at such brutish manners,” Loki articulated smoothly as he approached, unable to fully hide his smile.

 “Dadaaaaa,” Ullr wailed, holding his arms out and leaning in Sif’s arms towards his father. Sif laughed warmly while he took the child into his embrace and Ullr buried his face in Loki’s shoulder.

“And having a flair for the dramatic is a hallmark of accomplished sorcerers,” she affectionately quipped before leaning in to plant a kiss on the back of the baby’s head and on her husband’s smug grin.


	4. Expansion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for Sifki Week on [tumblr](http://psychoticgirl.tumblr.com/post/78233690167/twofold-chapter-4-murdur-loki-sif/)! I don't know how I feel about this, mostly I just enjoy butchering Norse mythology and was inspired by my recent trips to the ski hill.

They had made the plans long before her belly had grown so round. Sif insisted that they go through with it, knowing how much Loki was looking forward to the short vacation. And since she couldn’t fit into any of her custom made armor anyway, it was not as if she was truly missing out on any duties back home. She was starting to feel restless, and that typically lead to trouble and inter-Realm wars. They could all use a break.

So they found themselves on the realm of Midgard, in a rather snowy place, walking along the base of a ski hill. Sif thought it was possibly a bit mad to try to introduce the sport to Ullr when he was barely more than a toddler. But then again the child of War and Mischief was bound to grow up with a certain amount of audaciousness. And truly Ullr enjoyed the winter months as much as the summer, spending hours playing in the snow of the courtyard before being dragged inside for supper. And at least Loki had agreed to take the family to the much milder snows of Midgard, where they walked now, than any of the likes on Niflheim.

Loki had a short set of skis slung over his shoulder, his other hand holding onto the toddler’s. Ullr’s other hand held Sif’s as they strolled through the snow to an area referred to as the “bunny hill”, though the woman who provided them with the borrowed skis assured her with a strange look that no vermin were to be found in that particular area.

Ullr skipped excitedly between the two of them, gazing with wide eyes at the other children making their messy way down the nearly flat slope, his gloved hands tugging them forward. He was dressed warmly, layered in soft fabrics under a sleek coat and pants. His raven hair poked out from under the hat fashioned after the head of a wolf he had begged for in the ski shop. Sif peered down at him, glad he did not appear fearful, instead his eyes were bright and his face eager, though she still questioned the reasonableness of this whole ordeal.

“Are you sure it wouldn’t be more practical to send him with one of these professionals?” Sif gestured towards the group of adults in red ski uniforms herding preschoolers towards the small hill. Loki had turned his nose up at the idea of enrolling Ullr in lessons with the other Midgardian children when Sif had first suggested it.

“Professionals? They’ve been skiing for what, 30, maybe 40 years?” his eyebrows raised haughtily. “I have more experience accumulated just from the few vacations Mother took us on when I was a child. He will be under the care of the most practiced instructor on this entire realm.”

“Do be patient with him,” Sif sighed, lifting her free hand to the upturned collar of his dark coat, tugging him towards her. Ullr still clutched to both of their hands, jumping up and down in the fluffy snow impatiently while his parents kissed. “And take lots of hot chocolate breaks to come visit me and warm up, yes?” She crouched down to take Ullr’s face into her hands.

“Yes, Mama,” Ullr bounced as she pressed her lips to his cheek. “Go tee now?”

“Yes yes, go ski.” She adjusted his collar and straightened his wolf hat, then stood and made a shooing motion. “Off with the two of you.”

Loki walked Ullr up the incline a short way before helping him step into the bindings on the skis. She lingered for a while, laughing fondly behind a gloved hand at the determined look on her son’s face as Loki walked in front of Ullr, holding his hands and gently steering him on his small skis. She could hear Loki gently encouraging him, instructing in a calm but firm voice. The toddler plowed down the small hill, the tips of his skis pointed together. The wolf ears on top of his head bounced as he nodded seriously at Loki’s questions. “Oh-tay, Dada.”

Apparently pleased with his progression after a few runs holding onto his small hands, Loki opted to walk behind his child to allow a bit more independence. Sif was about to turn towards the warmth of the lodge when Ullr pointed his skis to the bottom of the hill, taking off at a much faster speed than before, careening away from Loki.

“Skis together, Ullr!” Loki shouted as he ran after him, his dark hair whipping in the cold air. Heading towards a mound of white snow piled a few feet high, Ullr appeared destined to crash into it.

Sif’s heart skipped a beat, dreading the inevitable ugly end to this, likely squashing Ullr’s innocent excitement for the new sport. She held her breath, contemplating calling out to Loki to use his magic to stop him, secrecy be damned.

Apparently heeding Loki’s words after all, Ullr formed his skis into a V-shape, slowing his momentum and turning into a shaky stop inches in front of the mound. He teetered for a moment before collapsing face-first into the snow pile. Loki sprinted over to pick him up, setting him back on his skis, brushing snow from his jacket and wiping it from his beaming face.

“Again, Dada!”

Sif laughed in relief as Loki pressed his lips together and looked long sufferingly towards the sky.

“This is all your fault you know,” he called out to her. “Blood of a warrior. All of this foolhardy daring is your doing.”

Sif rolled her eyes but couldn’t help grinning and waved a hand towards them as she turned towards the ski lodge.

 

Inside the warmth of the quaint building, the shieldmaiden picked a table near a window, laying her pack on top of it and lowering herself into the chair. The Asgardian enjoyed watching the humans bustling around the ski lodge and gracefully gliding down the impressive mountain face.

Their cultures moved so rapidly, forced forward by such short lifetimes. Things had to be accomplished quickly or they would never be done at all in this realm. But things seemed a bit slower here and she enjoyed the comfort of the familiar. Skiing was a sport that had hardly changed over thousands of years. Although Sif did find herself interested in trying this newfangled snowboarding; as such a thing had not even existed the last time she visited a Midgardian ski hill some century or two before.

She sighed and rested one hand atop her stomach, the other reaching into her pack to touch the soft fabric of Ullr’s royal blue blanket. She’d tucked it into the bag this morning, hoping he wouldn’t need the comfort but not wanting to risk its absence. Despite all his huffing and show, Loki cared deeply for the child and was adored likewise by Ullr. Absentmindedly rubbing a hand along her belly, Sif shook her head, thinking upon how parenthood and softened them both. And made them all the more ferocious in many regards. They may not be perfect people, nor perfect parents but she was confident that any child of theirs would always be loved fiercely.

After a few hours spent alone, reading a book and drinking tea, Sif began to grow restless. She had expected to see them sooner, knowing an exhausted Ullr was a cranky Ullr, much like his father. If Loki tried to push the toddler farther than he was equipped to handle, they would all suffer for it. Drumming her fingers on the table for a few more minutes, she pushed away from it and made her way back into the cold.

As Sif walked towards the bunny hill, she thought that perhaps it was a smart idea after all to keep Ullr out of the lessons, watching as wailing children toppled to the soft snow under the watch of the harried instructors. One such child was sprawled on her back, unmoving at the bottom of the hill, skis still attached to her boots as Sif approached.

“Are you alright, child?” Sif stopped to peer down. The girl glanced at Sif and nodded solemnly before turning her eyes back towards the grey skies. Sif pressed her lips together to keep from laughing and scanned the small hill for Loki’s tall form. He was no where to be seen, nor was the fur of Ullr’s hat.

Thinking that perhaps she missed them on their way to meet her, the warrior circled back towards the lodge.

"Mama!" It was then that she saw Ullr hurtling down the face of the mountain, Loki with his skis on following behind, calling out instructions.

"Mama look!” Ullr shouted with a beaming face to her again. He pointed his skis towards her, moving faster than a thrown Mjolnir before turning to the side and sliding to an abrupt stop at her feet, spraying snow up around them. “Go fast!”

He threw his arms around her legs in a happy embrace and Sif placed one hand on the back of his head, glaring daggers at her sheepish looking husband.

“What is the meaning of this?” she asked sweetly.

“Yes, well he grasped the basics of form quite quickly so I took him on the rope tow,” although his voice was placating, Loki’s eyes glinted with pride and devilry. “And he mastered that hill in about 30 minutes. So I inferred that it would be appropriate to introduce him to the small chairlift. And I could hardly keep up with him. I’ve never seen a child pick up on skiing so fast, Sif. Any child in any realm.”

Sif sighed. “We’re in trouble, aren’t we?”

Loki couldn’t stop the smirk from consuming his face at that. “I’m afraid we never had a chance, my dear.”

She crouched down slowly, feeling encumbered by the size of her belly, to lay a hand on Ullr’s cheek. “Are you having fun?”

“Go again!”

“I think we’d better eat,” she moved to pop his boots free from his skis but his tiny hands pushed at her.

“No! Go again! Go fast!” She could feel a tantrum looming and glanced at Loki who had the gall to grin at her.

“This is all your fault, you know,” she hissed. “Blood of royalty. All of the dramatics and entitlement is your doing.” Loki bowed before her with a flourish. Sif shook her and head turned back towards her son, whose arms had folded against his chest.

“No. Wanna tee,” tears began to well up in his eyes.

“You need to eat to keep your strength up, Ullr," she soothed. “And if you get too cold or too tired you won’t be able to ski anymore. So let’s all go have some nice hot chocolate, what do you say?”

“Hot choca!” he cheered.

The rest of the day was spent much the same as the morning. Sif watched from the balcony of the lodge as Ullr tore fearlessly and adeptly down the side of the snowy mountain, Loki chasing down his tiny form. Her heart swelled with pride at the sight of her brave, happy son. And only slight concern lingered at his recklessness. She saw so much of herself in him, stubborn and fearless. And so much of Loki, bright and quick and curious. She prayed to Yggradsil that his path would be at least slightly easier than ones cut for his parents.

Ullr did not stop until the chairlifts no longer ran, and the sun had dipped low in the sky. After slight persuasion that they would return in the morning, the Asgardians made their way to return the gear to the small shop in the lodge. Ullr held onto his father’s hand, bouncing happily as Sif laid the skis upon the counter. The woman behind the work table greeted the sight with a smile.

“So how’d your day go? Do you have a little Olympian on your hands?”

“Wrong pantheon,” Sif stated and the woman’s smile falter slightly, “but he is indeed quite powerful and skilled for such a young age.”

“Good,” she sounded unsure but smiled at Ullr again. “And how old are you, handsome?”

“Twenee-two,” Ullr bobbed two small fingers at her before Loki began to lead them towards the door. The woman’s confused laughter followed them out into the snow. Sif laughed too, watching the toddler’s wide, adoring eyes gazing back towards the ski hill with longing and wonder as Loki carried him to their rented vehicle. Loki placed the smiling Ullr in the back seat, fastening the safety belt securely before walking around the car to slide into the passengers seat.

Sif navigated the SUV through the snow, delighted by the ingenuity of these giant metal contraptions. She’d spent some time reading up on how to operate the horse-less sleigh, and maneuvered it easily along the wooded road, the yellow glow of the small mountain village illuminating softly against the white of the snowy peaks.

She glanced at Ullr’s enchanted face in the rearview mirror as he babbled happily, clutching his blanket and looking out the window. She glanced at Loki “mmhmm-ing” at the appropriate intervals to the toddler’s speech. Perhaps motherhood had made her a bit soft, but she found she didn’t mind the warmth she felt in that moment. She reached across the space of the vehicle and slid her hand into his. He grinned over at her, raising their entwined hands to press her knuckles to his lips.

 

The snow was falling in big fluffy flakes in the fading daylight as Sif pulled up to the winter cabin Loki arranged for them to rent for the week. Inside the door, Loki helped Ullr shed his ski clothes while Sif moved into the small kitchen of the wooden house. Filling a pot with water, she set it upon the contraption meant to act as a fire pit.

They bustled around the small cabin, Loki taking Ullr to bathe and change as Sf stood guardian over the boiling water cooking long noodles. Perhaps, she thought, she would have been more inclined to go after culinary pursuits at home if such convenience could be found in the market of Asgard, unscrewing a jar of spaghetti sauce.

Feeling a lean form press to her back, Loki wound his arms around her to smooth his long hands across her swollen stomach. His forehead pressed against her temple before his voice crept into her ear.

“There’s a joke to be made about the sight of the mighty shieldmaiden Sif standing pregnant in the kitchen, I’m sure.” She could practically feel the smirk.

“You would be less clever and charming than they say if you chose to make it,” she threatened.

“Always so quick to pick a fight,” he complained.

“Goddess of War,” she reminded him, “pregnant or not.”

“No less fearsome one way or another, I assure you.”

“You like making war with me,” she murmured confidently, reaching up to slide a hand into his hair as he kissed her neck, palming her belly.

“ _Obviously_ ,” his inflection was obscene.

She smacked the back of his head. They swayed together for a moment, Sif stirring the noodles and bubbling red sauce.

“I’m sorry we left you behind today. Perhaps we should have vacationed somewhere a bit more inclusive and relaxing...”

“As long as he’s happy, I’m happy.” She slid her hands on top of his. “Although I wouldn’t mind going snowshoeing while we’re here. That seems tame enough for this stomach. Or perhaps cross country skiing- ”

“Go tee!” Ullr shouted from the other room, dragging his blanket behind him as he slid into the kitchen wearing his warm pajamas.

“Obsessed,” Loki snorted into her shoulder before turning around.

 

Gathered around the small wooden table, they ate in the warm kitchen. Ullr swung his feet happily, munching on the fare of messy pasta. Slowly, his persistent questioning of “Do it again? Go tee-ing?” became further and further apart, his head tipping backwards, the noodles slipping off of his small fork as he fought through his apparent exhaustion from the long day.

The red sauce covering his cheeks, Sif’s shoulders shook as his head snapped back up only to roll forward onto his chest. Loki simply covered his face at the sight of Ullr falling asleep at the table. “I see he’s inherited your appalling table manners.”

“C’mon, your highness,” Sif pushed heavily up from her seat. “Let’s get him to bed.”

“No! Tory time!” Ullr’s head snapped back up, his eyes flying open. “Mama book!”

Sif nodded calmly, handing him his blue blanket. “Alright, one story before bed.”

Loki hauled him out of his chair, wiping at his face to magic the mess away and carried his loose form to the cozy master bedroom. With a sigh, Sif lumbered slowly up onto the soft covers of the bed. She would be happy for this pregnancy to be over, if only so she could move freely again.

Loki flicked a wrist to fill the fireplace with dancing light and then let his fingers glide along the spines of the Midgardian books lining the full shelves. He pulled one free and then crossed back to the bed. The book was colorful, adorned with drawn pictures of a blonde little girl and a family of furry beasts. Loki passed it to her and settled next to the warrior with Ullr curled in his lap.

Perhaps not as talented a storyteller as Loki, Sif still had much practice reciting rousing yarns, detailing her fair share of tales of glory in dark taverns and feasting halls. And she had a captive audience with Ullr who squealed with delight and clutched his blanket to his chest when she changed her voice to imitate the characters. He placed his small feet in her lap, turned towards her to listen from where he curled against Loki.

Becoming more engrossed in the absurd tale of the trespassing girl, Sif wondered absently where such talking beast could be found on this realm, perhaps for their next vacation. When she raised her head next, closing the book on the final page, she sighed fondly at the sight.

Loki’s head lolled back against the headboard, holding Ullr’s slumped form to him with one arm. Apparently chasing after a mischievous little boy was just as exhausting as causing the mayhem.

Setting the book aside, she ran a hand against Ullr’s dark hair and gently lifted him out of his father’s lap to lie against the pillows, still clutching his blanket. Loki stirred slightly, cracking his eyes open to gaze warmly at Sif as she pushed her body to lay next to the slumbering child. He slipped down too, curling behind Ullr’s small back and reached his top arm over his small form to rest atop Sif’s stomach. Sif folded her own arm up, placing a hand over his and sighed contently, warm and happy in the arms of her family.


End file.
